Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Here's a Nickel's Worth of Free Advice

Just because two people say things does not mean that they both made valid points. Much more often, one person is just speaking nonsense, and should consequently be punished for their insolent behavior.

For example, if I say something and you disagree with it, you are wrong and should be ostracized from society.

Therefore, ergo, and henceforth, you shall all be on notice, people. No more Mister Nice Smokey. And do you want to know why? Because not ONE of you sent me a Guy Fawkes Day card. Not one.

Disappointed, America. Very disappointed. [SMOKEY shakes head.]

And don't be all like, "oh, I was busy," because I know you fucking found time to vote. Jerk.

3 comments:

Jesus said...

Well, I never get a card from you on my birthday, so I'd say we're even.

Matt said...

Whatever, Dude. It's probably because I'm busy giving presents to everyone else for Your Birthday. Thanks for that, by the way. Thanks for making me spend my entire Christmas bonus on other people.

And also: whatever, Dude again. I write You letters all the time, so quit whining, Jesus!

Seriously, shut up. You are being such an Idiot.

Jesus said...

Remember that you get presents on MY birthday, too, genius. So stop being such a sniveling martyr or I'll tell my Dad. Then you'll be sorry.